The Santa Secret

My kids are getting at the age where they are starting to catch on to the Santa secret. Especially my 6-year-old son Benjamin.

Every year our playgroup has its annual Christmas party at one of our houses and one of the dads dresses up like Santa. The costume is quite good, and this Santa actually convinces his followers that he commutes down the chimney, before thundering down the staircase with a giant sack of toys for the eager, wide-eyed children waiting below.

Last year Benji pulled me aside after the gift giving and said, "Mom, that's not really Santa Claus, it's Tulah's dad!" It was hard to deny the pressing truth. However, while we admitted that people do dress up as Santa Claus, we told him that the real Santa Claus only comes on Christmas Eve. He seemed to buy that, and still does as far as we can tell.

The hard part was having him keep hush about the Santa secret to the other children, who are his age and younger. My friend tried to bargain with Benjamin this year, admonishing him that Santa would not give him a gift if he spilled the beans. It worked to a point, but he did admit that he "tried to tell Tulah that Santa is her dad, but she wouldn't believe me. She said she knows her dad's eyes anywhere."

My 5-year old Juliana is seemingly more gullible, more naive about these things. Benji told her the Santa secret, which she relished, saying in her high-pitched singsong voice, "I know the Santa secret!"


Interestingly, Benji and Juliana surprised me. One night before Christmas as we drove home in cold twilight, Benji (the skeptic, the big brain) proudly announced, "I hear Santa's bells! I see Santa's sleigh, up there in the sky, look!" Juliana, as expected, oohed and ahhed at his proclamation.

When Benji and Julie raced to the tree on Christmas day, I was not sure what their reaction might be. They both jumped for joy of course, tearing off the wrapping paper like lions ripping apart their meat. "Santa came! Santa came!" they both cried in unison. Then there was the kicker. Juliana pulled me aside and said, "Mommy, I'm so glad Santa came. He even used our wrapping paper!"

So far, the Santa secret has only been partially revealed. Let's see what happense next year. For now the Santa magic still remains.

Help, I'm Leaking!

I'm 21 weeks pregnant and now I'm in the midst of the Mother of All Head Colds. Sick as a dog, body aches and pains, and what's worse coughing and sneezing my head off.
That only means one thing.

DEPENDS!

I'm not quite there yet -- I thought this wasn't supposed to happen well into old age. But whenever I sneeze or cough, which is like, all the time, the flood gates burst open. Stayfree Maxipads don't always help either. Sometimes they're as useless as coffee filters.

Bladder control, hey, what's that?! Apparently this leakage is quite common in pregnant women, especially induced through sneezing, coughing or bouts of hysterical laughter.

Oh boy. Now I'm inspired to write a rap song about it:

Help! I'm Leaking (or I'm Not an Old Lady, This is Driving Me Crazy)

Whenever I'm coughin' or a sneezin'
You know it means I'm leakin'

Refrain: I'm not an old lady, this is drivin' me crazy.
This is supposed to happen at 80, not to a nice young lady!

Get me a diaper, or a windshield wiper
After you have babies, your bladder leaks like gravy

Refrain: I'm not an old lady, this is drivin' me crazy.
This is supposed to happen at 80, not to a nice young lady!

Stop the flood from spillin'
So this girl can be chillin

Refrain: I'm not an old lady, this is drivin' me crazy.
This is supposed to happen at 80, not to a nice young lady!

I want to stop feeling like a freak
And more like fresh meat!

Refrain: I'm not an old lady, this is drivin' me crazy.
This is supposed to happen at 80, not to a nice young lady

Such is the life of a pregnant woman. More to come...stay tuned!

Halfway along...are we there yet?

I finally reached my halfway point in the pregnancy. 20 weeks...yippee!
But does this mean I have to wait ALMOST FOUR MORE MONTHS till this is over?
My back is killing me, I can't sleep at night -- tossing and turning trying to get a decent position. It's hard to sit at an office chair for more than 20 minutes without feeling the baby pressing on my body, challenging my equilibrium and my back.
If I eat too much I expand like a balloon, and then feel so full I could burst. Can't complain too much about that, though, it's like a stomach valve -- natural weight control! I think I gained the most weight in the first trimester -- thank God for small things.
The cravings have subsided, but I still get pretty nauseous and queasy at times, even while sleeping.
Give me the strength!